Some pies and some cakes

Some 'average' Singaporean cakes/doughnuts. Any cake is a good cake by its very definition, but relatively speaking, these were average or even below average. They were cheap though.





A high quality Singaporean meat pie. You can see it all bursting to get out. Obviously lacking some gravy in the meal form as seen here, but the vegetables on show were just that: it gives me mum the impression that I'm eating a balanced diet. As soon as I'd taken the picture I threw the veg in the bin and got straight into the pie.





Not a pie or a cake: a girly fruit salad. Ladies - why would you order something like this when you were at a high quality cake establishment? It just doesn't make sense. You might think it looks pretty but it certainly doesn't taste as good as a cake. Nowhere near. I'll tell you why you do it, and it's not just with cakes. You do it with all sorts of food: "Ooohh. I'll have some fruit. I don't want to put any weight on, do I?" Then you go and eat half of the cake that the lad buys. "I've not really had any, have I?" YES YOU HAVE! You've eaten half my cake and all of your fruit salad. It's the same with chips. You buy a salad and then eat half of the chips on your boyfriend's/husband's plate. Just get your own and stop playing mind games with yourself. And while I'm on this subject, let's mention girls who eat Ryvita or whatever that crackerbread's called that tastes like cardboard that's been out in the sun for too long. "Ooohh. I want to lose weight. Look at me - I've got some Ryvita for my lunch." Is that right? How come you've just spread some cream cheese on it that's 3 inches thick?





This was my cake at the same place as the above in Vietnam. I think it cost about 60p in real money. I was happy eating it but a little bit sad at the end.





Cake on the job. Happy days.

Chiang Mai Expedition

Just got back from my last trip up to northern Thailand, where we take the Grade 8 kids to do some rafting and a little bit of trekking. I don't do that much apart from fill my face with the local food and tell kids that they'll have to do stuff for themselves during the week, what with their maids not being there.



Raft training: "If you fall out of your raft, it might be a bit like this. But you'll be in water, not sat on the grass."



You would not believe how many of these 14 year old Dustbin lids cannot even use a lighter to start a fuel stove. Rob told me one morning that I'd have to let the kids practise and I thought he was joking. No joke. They're 14 years old and not one of them is smoking yet! What a disgrace. My mum started smoking when she was 9 years old. These kids have so much to learn...






We do an afternoon of walking and the kids have to do some orienteering, but then we camp for the next few nights while we raft down the river.



Showing a lad how to use these things to make bread turn in to toast.



A local lady, working hard on her way to the kitchen.



We stop in a local 'Karan' village the next night, right on the river. It's a right treat to get woken up at 4 in the morning by a cock-a-doodle-do animal. Sometimes it might even be a pig fighting with a dog.



Kids screaming



Elephants at the last put-in on the final day.



It's true what they say about elephants. I came across this same one three weeks earlier and it still remembered my name. Absolutely amazing.



The kids all have a raft and a Thai guide with them. I tend to take one of the kayaks so that I can keep my distance from the kids.







Most of them manage to stay in their rafts...



...although a few fall out and end up taking a bit of a rough swim.

"So, can I ask you where you were when my child was drowning in a rapid?"
"I was down the river paddling my kayak."





Third camp. The start of the Dirty Dancing 'Lift' rendition during a talent show. Rob's playing Patrick Swayze's character, while I'm playing Baby. Rob's just told the audience that "nobody puts Baby in a corner."




The famous 'Lift'. Notice the ease with which Rob lifts me high above his head.




Just like the original in many ways.

Christmas 'Do'

Went to a Christmas 'Do' last week where we had to get dressed up. This is the hareem of girls that I took with me and you can clearly see the joy on all their faces. You might notice that I am holding what looks like a Martini. This is true, although this was the first time I've ever had Martini and it was the drink they give you when you walk in, before you find the beer, so that's my excuse. I won't be drinking it again, mind you. There was an olive in it. You know, like what the Greeks eat. An olive?!! Some people. This country...



It was a very good night but part of me can't help thinking these things are a bit pretentious. Why couldn't I just have gone in my shell-suit and trainers? Maybe it's just this attitude that caused everyone else to leave me on my own at the table.

Happy Christmas everyone. Don't forget to put the 'Christ' into Christmas this year. Unless you're Muslim.